The Blind Leading the Blindaaa

 

 

PART 1

 

I met “pastor” Josh today of the Faith Apostolic Church on the northside of Carmel, Indiana and found out something I wish I had known eleven years ago – I needn’t have gone to the seminary - more on that in a minute.

 

Brother Josh – the associate “pastor” – was a very kind, yet nervous young man.  He showed my friend Marcus and me around the “church,” which consisted of two medium sized designated worship areas – one for the children and one for the adults.  Apparently the children worshiped the eight pound six ounce baby Jesus that Ricky Bobby did in Talladega Nights, while the adults entertained a different Jesus altogether.

 

The diminutive Brother Josh nervously showed us around and led us directly to the worship center – I truly believed that young brother thought we were going to peal away parts of our sweatshirts to reveal the bright yellow letters ATF and therefore, was dancing and looking for a way out all at the same time.

 

However, we were kind and cordial – I think it was our size that frightened him.  Or was it our simple yet direct questions…

 

“Who governs the church?”

“Is there a board of elders and if so how do they function?”

“Do you believe the Bible to be the Holy Inerrant Word of God?”

“How many do you have in attendance at worship?”

“Did you or the Senior “pastor” attend Seminary?”

“Do you belong to a larger church body?”

“Does that body have a leader?”

“How does that leader work with FAC?”

 

 

Simple yet direct questions that any pastor should be able to answer quickly and with out feeling backed into a corner – questions any "pastor should expect and that should be on the tip of any seeker's tongue worth his salt – especially that tongue just tasted Chinese!

 

Yet, brother Josh seemed quite anxious at the questions raised and seemed to become just a tad defensive.  Answers to the questions above and in order…

 

“Pastor Ball.”

“Yes, there is a board of trustees that see to the church.”

“Yes, we do believe the Bible to be Holy and without error.”

“We have about 300 members in this church and 300 on a Sunday and about 120 on a Wednesday night.”

“No.  We each attended IU. He worked under his father and I worked under him.  I did take a class through a seminary in West Virginia.  I’ve preached in all of the States and 20 countries.”

“Yes, we do.”

“Yes, it does – Bishop Robert Martin.”

“He can say to us that we should do something and then we will pray about it and Pastor Ball will make a decision.”
 

 

 

So we begin the conversation and end the conversation with Pastor Ball – who really is running things at FAC.  Pastor Ball is the end-all-to-be-all of this “church.”  But let’s not be hasty – let’s take a look at what Brother Ball teaches from his acrylic podium and we will do just that in PART Twoaaa.

 

And about the seminary thing – I could have saved myself tens of thousands of dollars and a lot of time and effort had I just found a preacher to listen to and then have him pronounce me licensed and ordained!!!  Holy crap!!! Where’s the Tylenol!!!